Tuesday, July 19, 2011


No thinspo, I don't even want to look.
I don't know what happened guys. I really don't... I was doing just fine all day no cravings or anything, I was just more and more shaky. I got home from clothes shopping where I bought 2 pairs of size 0 pants for motivation. It was 4pm and time for my 1/2C Special K cereal with 1/4 cup light vanilla soy milk. I measured it out and sat down at the table. I've been looking forward to it all day (because yesterday it tasted like heaven) and I took a bite and it was bitter. So I tried again and again. I got pissed and grabbed a new bowl and spoon thinking that was what was wrong and poured ANOTHER bowl. Same thing so i dumped it. Totally pissed I poured a bowl of my roommates cinnamon toast cereal with skim milk and ate it. Then the binge began. I was anger eating. I had:
2 kashi blackberry bars
50 blueberries
12 strawberries
1/2 cup skim milk
1C cinnamon toast cereal
1 medium orange
1 plum
1 tsp strawberry jam
1/2C salted almonds
some sips of chocolate sot milk
the rest of my vitabrownie

what. the. hell. Guys, I seriously have never ever binged like this before. I din't even want to add that shit up. Talk about a gigantic failure... I feel like a shithead right now. I'm so so stupid. Who gets angry and eats? I mean really... That was just so so incredibly stupid. I am more than sorry everyone, not just because I will gain weight, but because I let you down. I am so sorry. I broke my promise... I'm sorry...
I will stay with ABC, I won't let this stop me, no matter how bad I feel. But I do feel like complete shit right now.


  1. Okay, just to clear things up.
    A) That was NOT much of a fail. IT WASN'T TOO MUCH FOOD! So don't feel bad, its FINE.
    B) You obviously needed the food as you were shaky all day, and you're not alone when it comes to angry eating. I have it worse than you as I eat when I'm angry, happy, sad, annoyed, depressed, agitated, or any other mood really.
    C) DON'T be too hard on yourself. If you've been restricting for some time now, this binge might do you good. It would kick start your metabolism! :D So if you restrict tomorrow you CAN lose a whole pound or more.

    Please, don't be so harsh on yourself. You didn't fail anyone, you're still strong(:
    Just let it go, continue with ABC tomorrow, and I MIGHT start ABC tomorrow too :O [you just motivated me to go at it]

    Don't worry, you're doing great. Slip-ups happen, the trick is to jump over them and move on.
    So stay strong and motivated, it'll all be fine.

  2. Carrot, that really made me feel so much better. I was just so upset that I strayed off track. All your points are true and make me feel much better. I know binges aren't ever good but it did have some positive side effects (: Thank you <3
    The fact that I've motivated you to possibly start ABC tomorrow really makes me feel so good.

    Thank you. I will, today has motivated me to try even harder!

  3. That is probably one of the healthiest binges I have heard of. There are a lot of good nutrients in what you had so take that as a positive, a nourishment for your body. My binges usually involve a whole tub of soy ice cream AND a whole tube of chocolate sauce. 0 nutrients, A MOUNTAIN of sugar and fat.

    Put it behind you and pick up from where you left off. We know you can do it.

    Love AJ xxx

  4. Thank you so so much AJ <3 Sometimes I wonder if binges are our bodies reaction to a restrictive diet and we eat things the body needs...